I almost had a panic attack
Here’s the thing about nervous system regulation. You’re never done. There’s never a point where you’re just regulated and you stay zen all the time. That’s not how it works.
Regulation means that you easily move through the different phases of the Autonomic Nervous System. You engage Fight or Flight when necessary. You drop into Freeze when necessary. But then you’re able to navigate back into your Parasympathetic response when all the threats are gone.
You’re still going to experience anxiety because anxiety is a part of life. But it won’t paralyze you. It won’t last for days on end. And it won’t be because of something only slightly uncomfortable.
So being triggered by something doesn’t make me feel like a failure. It doesn’t mean that I’m not “healed”. It might mean that I have some more things to work through. But I’m not worried about it. It’s just information that allows me to continue to do my work.
I was supposed to be interviewed on a podcast today. It was something I was really looking forward to and only had positive feelings about it. Until the night before, when suddenly I started doubting myself.
What if she asks me a question I don’t know how to answer?
What if I start talking about something I only know a little bit about and can’t fully explain it?
What if I start sharing personal family information that I would rather keep private and end up oversharing?
What if my anxiety takes over and I lose my train of thought?
All of these “what if’s” starting piling up in my head and I started feeling a lot of anxiety. More than I’ve felt in a very long time.
But despite the intensity of the anxiety, I didn’t have a panic attack, and I was able to go to bed calm, and that felt like a huge win. Here’s what I did that made the difference:
I acknowledged my thoughts
I asked myself where the fear was coming from. What was the worst-case scenario? If the worst-case scenario happened, would I still be okay? Walking through that helped me to feel so much calmer. It wasn’t a live interview so if I lost my train of thought, it could just be edited out. If I realized I overshared, I could request that it be edited out. Not knowing the answer to something is okay, it means I’m human! And if I lose my train of thought, I’ll just pause until I find it or move on to something else.
I did what I could to ground myself
I paid attention to all my felt senses. Doing this prevents me from being stuck in the freeze state and keeps me in my body. Noticing things like my breath, how my feet feel on the ground, any textures around me, smells - doing whatever I could to be in my body as much as possible. If you ever feel yourself starting to go into panic mode, a simple exercise is just to lie flat on the ground or a hard surface. Notice what parts of your body are touching the ground and what parts aren’t. This helps you to come back into your body.
I supplemented with magnesium
I drink this Calming Magnesium most nights anyway, but I definitely needed it last night. It always makes me feel calmer and more in my body. Magnesium really is a miracle mineral.
I took some GABA
We make GABA to help our bodies feel calm and centered. I don’t like taking this every day, but when I need a little extra help with my neurotransmitters, this is a great addition. I use THIS ONE from Amazon.
I took a Kids Mood+ Pixie Stick
This supplement is meant for kids but it works great for adults. It’s meant to help you feel calm and focused. I take one anytime I’m about to do something that would normally cause a lot of anxiety for me. I’ll be flying this week so I’ll definitely be taking some before my flight. It makes an unbeliever difference without making you feel groggy! Check it out HERE.
I wasn’t afraid of my anxiety
In the past, just the existence of my anxiety would just cause more anxiety. I’d get stuck in this vicious loop and it would take a long time for me to break out of it. But now I understand what’s happening. I understand my Nervous System’s response. And understanding takes all the fear away.
It’s not bad, I’m not broken, I’m not dying. It’s just my nervous system reacting to a perceived threat. It’s up to me, my conscious mind, to decide what to do next.
Regulating your nervous system doesn’t mean you’re just calm all the time. You’ll still have anxiety. You’ll still have some tense moments. The different phases of your Nervous System are not bad, they’re actually very necessary. Regulating just means that they’re all used appropriately for the situation.
It’s understandable that I’d be nervous before my first podcast interview. If it didn’t go well, it could affect my reputation. Which could affect my business, which could affect my livelihood and everything I’ve been working toward. Of course there’s going to be some anxiety. Sometimes just giving ourselves that permission to sometimes feel this way makes it less intense.
If you haven’t already, put together a tool kit. Make a note on your phone or write it down somewhere. Come up with some tools you can use to regulate when you start to feel your anxiety kicking on because you won’t always remember in the moment.
If you follow me on Instagram, look through my Regulate highlight if you need some ideas of things to try.
And I must sing the praises once again of Happy Juice. Since I’ve been drinking it consistently, these types of moments have been few and far between, and even when I do have them, it’s like they’re turned way down in intensity. I can’t recommend it enough.
You can read more about it and purchase it HERE.
I didn’t end up doing the podcast because the interviewer had some family stuff come up. But we’re rescheduled for next week. So now I can prepare more ahead of time and set myself up for success!
